Bovada - Odds to 2014-2015 NCAA Men's Basketball Championship:
- Arizona : 9/1
- University of California Los Angeles: 66/1
- Oregon: 100/1
- Stanford: 100/1
- Colorado: 200/1
- Arizona State: 300/1
- University of Southern California: 300/1
- California: 300/1
- Washington: 500/1
For some universities, March is a wonderful time of year. The snow melts away, animals return from their deep sleep and the Big Dance is in full swing, complete with your run of the mill couch burnings, rioting and general jubilant mob mentality behavior. But for the rest of us, it's time to plot our way to the arena everyday, hoping our team manages to pull that one big upset that allows you to step foot on that hardwood. The beauty about the Big Dance, however, is every year there is a Cinderella, a team left off all of those top 25 rankings, a team forsaken by Vegas and general college basketball fans alike, who comes to the party and shocks the world.
Now whether your team is a top contender or a hopeful belle of the ball, can your team run the table and win NCAA Division 1 National Basketball Championship? Can they reach the pinnacle of college basketball success? Can they scratch and claw their way to the mountain top of NCAA glory? Probably not. Compared to the real world, a lot of extraordinary things are a LOT more likely. Don't believe me? Let's take a look...
Arizona (9/1) vs. Getting Away With Murder (2/1): I don't condone violence... but as a betting man... (All jokes aside, that is legitimately terrifying.)
UCLA (66/1) vs. A Food-Poisoning Outbreak Came From Salsa & Guacamole (25/1): I knew I shouldn't have trusted you Chipotle, but you're just too damn delicious.
Oregon (100/1) vs. Getting Hemorrhoids (25/1): Bet on bootiful bumhole burn (I keep telling you guys alliterations are fun). I mean, it makes sense; Preparation H is a million dollar corporation for a reason.
Stanford (100/1) = You Are Drunk Right Now (100/1): And I would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you meddling Internet.
Colorado (200/1) vs. Being A "Frequent" Cocaine User (150/1): Remember all of those times you've heard someone utter the words "say hello to my little friend?" Well by this logic, it's a safe bet that they'll have that mountain of coke to match.
Arizona State (300/1) vs. Being On A Plane with a Drunk Pilot (117/1): Coming in hot with the Flight fear. Remember boys and girls, when boarding your flight back home this winter break, the odds your pilot is as drunk as a frat boy on Cinco is better than Savon Goodman getting us our first basketball national title
USC (300/1) vs. Finding Out Your Child Is A Genius (250/1): Back to the positives, odds your child ends up Malcolm stack up alright I guess. Jury's out on becoming an ABQ methamphetamine king pin.
Cal (300/1) vs. Living In Utah & Subscribing To An "Adult" Site (182/1): That might seem kinda mundane, until you realize that's the highest rate in the US of A. No judgement here Utah, just surprising is all.
Washington (500/1) vs. Being Arrested For A Marijuana Offense (428/1): Luckily for the residents of Washington, you can now legally smoke yourself into a mini-coma. I'm not a doctor, but I've played many a game of Operation and in my professional opinion, Papa John's pizza and a gang of that Cali good good will make losing a tad bit more bearable... and a lot more hilarious.