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Thanksgiving Feast of Pac-12 College Basketball

There were games in Atlantis, California, and Alaska on Thanksgiving Day around the Pac-12 Conference. Sadly, despite their geological differences, none of the contests were close.

Gary A. Vasquez-USA TODAY Sports

A day of Thanksgiving and all-around gluttony produced college basketball tournaments, as well as professional football games to tickle our fancy.  If your guilty conscience kicked in over watching an inherently violent game, hopefully you tuned over to the soft and cuddly Battle 4 Atlantis.

There were three Pac-12 Conference games on Thursday, none of which were close.

#5 North Carolina 78, #22 UCLA 56: Turnovers, turnovers, turnovers.  While the Tar Heels may not actually be 20 points better than the Bruins, any time a team posts just seven assists while turning the ball over 23 times, they're going to have a bad time.

The starting backcourt of Normal Powell, Bryce Alford and Isaac Hamilton was responsible for 18 of the 23 turnovers.  That same group would combine for just five assists.

Why weren't there any assists?  Nothing seemed to be going down, and common sense tells us, if the ball doesn't go in the hoop, it's awfully hard to get an assist.  The Bruins would end the day 1-for-14 from three with Kevin Looney being the lone soul to make one (it would be his first of the year, nonetheless).

On the other side of the court, the nation's number five team operated like a well-oiled machine.  Pre-season All-America guard Marcus Paige led the charge, hitting four threes of his own on his way to a 21-point, five-assist game.

Washington 78, San Jose State 56: Yes, the score of this game is the exact same as the last one, I didn't make a typo.  Unfortunately, Washington didn't allow for it to be much of a game.

In the opening contest of the Wooden Legacy in Fullerton, California, the aspect that made the game watchable beyond halftime was the stunningly horrific Cal-State Fullerton court.  It's like watching reality television, or professional wrestling-when you're watching it, it's the most important thing in the world, but after it's over you can't help but think about how much time you wasted on it.  Here's to you, Titan Gym.

Freshman Donaven Dorsey didn't even score in a game last week.  On Thanksgiving night, he would play 25 minutes as he let it fly from deep, going 5-for-6, aiding to his team-high 17 points.

It may have been an explosion out of nowhere from Dorsey, but joining him off the bench was Robert Upshaw who had a block party in which all were welcome-and this wasn't the first time.  Playing in less than half the game, he turned back seven shots, tying his season-high.

You could make a case that either was player of the game for the Huskies, but leading the way was Nigel Williams-Goss.  While he wasn't raining threes or turning back shots at the rim, Williams-Goss played a tough-nosed style of ball, finishing the game with 13 points, six rebounds and eight assists.  The most exciting thing about the win was the promise of getting to see the Titan Gym floor another time.

UC Santa Barbara 71, Washington State 43: "Ooo-ooo-ooo, that smell!  Can't you smell that smell!?!?"  Maybe I should be more cognizant of the fact that the Cougars had to travel out to Alaska in the middle of the winter; chances are that wasn't too fun.  BUT, a 30-point loss to the Gauchos!?  For the love and respect of Larry Scott, you have to put up more than 12 points in the first half!

Let's go inside the numbers of this disaster: the Cougs shot just 22.8 percent from the field in this travesty to all of mankind.  That's 13 makes, 44 misses.  Their starters not named Junior Longrus went a combined 2-for-28 from the floor.  If they played the damn game outside on a polar ice cap, chances are the players could have shot better.

Then there was Zalmico Harmon.  A guy who was held scoreless by Florida Gulf Coast (yes, that FGCU) last week went crazy for a season-high 17 points against Wazzu.  He had scored all of 13 points combined coming into the contest.

I want to act like a Pac-12 team didn't just get humiliated on the road by 30 to a school from the Big West Conference, but I guess to escape it, I'll just have to curl up somewhere in Alaska.